Gongey’s BlogDescribing the Indescribable World of The Gongey

All things Gongey

A Gongey is a special being. Having been created in the fiery furnaces of hell...wait...let me start over.
Back when collars were huge and pants were in the shape of bells I was born. The year was 1977. After 10 long months of gestation I was ready to join the world and make my contribution.
This blog is a record of my life. Good, bad and generally mundane!

Well, I got another bug in me to build.  This time it’s building a tandem bike.  Here is the story so far:

I think to myself after seeing a couple of tandem bike websites; “you know what, I could build one of those!”  And I was off researching different designs and gathering equipment(an extra bike from Sue).  I got everything together and started my adventure.  Well 2 hours into it and I strip out a bunch of threads on the crank(the pedal), which makes it so I can no longer get the crank off the bike.  So I try everything in my repretoire to get the damn thing off…no luck.  So using the cave man instinct, I bashed the thing with a hammer.  Well in my excessive “bashing” I bent the $#%^ out of the frame, turning the frame into a scratched and marred paper weight!  Son of a ….!

So on to the assistance part.  I need another donor bike.  If you know anyone that has a mt. bike they no longer want, please let me know.  I need it to finish my tandem!

But the funny part about this whole story;  I don’t NEED to build a tandem bike.  I have a perfectly good one coming to my house by the end of this month!  So why the crap would I do this to myself?!?  I think it was passed down from Grandpa Ivie.  The dreaded “I can build that!” syndrome!


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45 Responses to Need your ass-is-tance!

  1. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    Thats great Brian, That really is an awesome project for you to do! So the question isn’t “can you make it?” but it’s Can you ride it? it would be kinda silly for someone to make somthing they can’t ride LIMHOL (laugh in my head out loud)

  2. The boy who cried Gongey says:

    Well I have a bike but you would have to come back to Denver. Until then it will remain hainging in my garage.

  3. The boy who cried Gongey says:

    Now that I think about it, even if you did fly here I don’t think you would fit it in the overhead compartment. Also I am not sure if it is a “mountain bike” all I know is that it has 2 pedals, 2 very flat tires, and if you head bang on it you WILL hit the curb and slide across the grass for a couple of yards. I know what you are thinking “who would be stupid enough to head bang on a bicycle”. all I can tell you is SHUT UP I will stab you in the face!!!

  4. Semi Gongey says:

    I will put in an order at work…I am sure I can get my hands on one or two or three…I have drill this weekend but will be back to work on Monday so…..hmmmmm let me think divide by PI, multiply by twenty thousand, minus 7 for work, add 12 for not working…Subtract infinite, should have it to you by Thursday…..OH MAN! Forgot to carry the 1, should have it to you by Friday, you can check my math if you want but I think I am right. Math never was my strong subject, I am more gooder at english. I talk more good than I can add,

  5. Gongey says:

    LOL!!! Head banging on a bike?!?!?! Too bad you didn’t get that on video, that would be a hit on the Internet. Oh yeah, I currently have enough holes in my face, so please don’t stab my face.

    Scott, yeah your math is correctly correct. If you can get me 2 bikes that would be great, if not, 1 will do just fine! By the way, my Engrish is the most goodest. Fa rararara ra ra ra ra. Deck that hars with bawrs of fawry.

  6. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    Haha! I think that happened to me and my family one time around christmas when we went to cafe kim! lol Oh yeah brian you didn’t answer my question…. it was the first entry too!

  7. Gongey says:

    Yes of course it will be ride-able! 😀

  8. Gongeylittle says:


  9. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    RANDOM! I”m serious what does grandma have to do with bikes ?

  10. The boy who cried Gongey says:

    Is your Grandma Lance Armstrong?

  11. Gongeylittle says:

    That would be odd.

  12. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    Well how would that one work out? lol nevermind I don’t think I want to know……

  13. Queen says:

    Bicycle bicycle bicycle
    I want to ride my bicycle I want to ride my bike
    I want to ride my bicycle I want to ride it where I like…

  14. Semi Gongey says:


  15. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    really were do people come up with these songs?

  16. Queen says:

    You know… one day I wanted to ride my bicycle and I just thought… hey that would make a great song!

  17. Mary says:

    So how did the band Queen find Gongey.com? Suspicious!

  18. Gongeylittle says:

    Ya, um… nevermind

  19. Gongey says:

    They found it through Spiritual Osmosis. Considering Freddy Mercury is D-E-D…dead. I followed Tobins Spirit guide to the “T”. The entire site is made from Cold-riveted girders with selenium cores AND the ironwork of the website extends down through fifty feet of bedrock and touches the water table.

    BTW, I am Vinz Clortho. Keymaster of Gozer, Volguus Zildrohar, Lord of the Sebouillia. >:)

  20. Gongey says:

    Oh yeah, Scott came through BIG TIME with a mother lode of bikes! So hopefully I will have a working proto-type within the next couple of days.

  21. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    yayy for scott! and Brian! you lucky guy. And thats awesome queen is talking with us! Well i’m not convinced about taht song about that bycycle…. it sounded familiar

  22. Gongeylittle says:

    I give up! I quit tyring to understand these, so i’m only going to respond if they are worthy of my response.

  23. Gongeylittle says:

    That one did’nt count

  24. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    Did taht one not count as well? haha

  25. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    You guys I need a new name… how about “the undead Gongey”? thats pretty good right??

  26. The boy who cried Gongey says:

    How about “Gongeys are bitchin”

  27. Gongeylittle says:

    Haha You just got yourself busted!!!!! You are talking to a minor. please be careful.

  28. Gongey says:

    Whatchoo talkin’ about?! Bitchin’ is a good word. Ahh…it takes me back to the early 90’s. I can still see the people wearing pink and purple shirts with the word “Bitchin'” scrawled on it’s front.
    Oh man those were the days.

  29. Gonginus minutus maternus says:

    Ashley is such a cute gongey, but sometimes I think blondiegongie would fit her perfectly. Ask ash about her bike tires. They are so un poppable they would make a great addition to your tandem if you should decide to make it an off-road version. Not sure if you can do a lift kit for a bike. that would be awsome!

  30. Gongey says:

    hahaha yeah that would! “I have a 12″ lift on my bike!” Yeah it’s a chick magnet.

  31. Syd says:

    Ash your cute! lol It’s not like I don’t say worse 0_0 haha……. And brian did you wear one of those Bitchin’ shirts? Were they really really tight? lol that would be funny to see you in one of them

  32. mary says:

    Chick magnet huh?

  33. Gongey Blondie says:

    I freakin’ quit

  34. ?!?! says:

    By the way you can kiss my @$$!

  35. Gongeylittle says:


  36. Gongeylittle says:

    HAHA! that’s just like your bitchin word.

  37. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    okay now I’m totally confused with ppls names now …… Man this Family (and group of friends) are CRAZAY!!! haha I love you guys alot tho

  38. Gonginus minutus maternus says:

    Ashley! I hope you were not the one to say kiss my***. Syd my name is litteraly what it means: gongy littles mom in latin(may be latin, sounded cool anyway. Subject to change) Bri, hope you have maintained cool and not stripped any more parts. Hint. pound a flat head screwdriver in a stripped screw and most the time it will unscrew. fyi for fun for those who did not know. :}

  39. Gongey says:

    the bike is nearing completion! w00t

  40. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    haha okay I get it now! Thank you !

  41. The boy who cried Gongey says:

    Lack of posts grating on nerves…….lets just hope some guy from colorado doesn’t go crazy and start killing people.

  42. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    Interesting….. What part of Colorado? How about SOuth Park ColoradO???

  43. Semi Gongey says:


  44. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    “Who’s they?” you know…. they!……. they killed him! yeah….. they’re bastards!

  45. ¡¤§ ¥ ð µ £ £¤¡ says:

    haha I hope I dind’t shock everybody with that last comment 0_0

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